Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Freshman blues

I took a five-hour nap today, so being up right now doesn't bother me.

I also talked to Katy about transferring; she encouraged me to at least look around because if anything it'll help solidify reasons why Geneseo does work for me . . . she went through a similar thing last year as far as doubts about being here are concerned.

It's unsurprising, I guess, that the gripes I have with this place reflect the trepidations I had when looking at schools senior year. I wanted to be in a somewhat metropolitan area, and I didn't want to be too far from home. I didn't want to be shipped upstate somewhere where the only activity on the weekends is drinking.

Funny how things work out.

When I really put everything into perspective, I'm about 95% sure that I'm staying. I couldn't ask for better friends here, I have a scholarship, and there's no way I'll be able to transfer all my credits and be paying a comparable tuition somewhere else. What I need is a reality check, an assurance that yes, there is a world outside this campus and yes, I am still a part of it.

Katy told me that while everyone says the first semester is hard, the reality is that the first year is the hardest of your life. I believe her completely, but I just find it so difficult to grasp that it'll take a full quarter of my undergraduate career to adjust . . . and I think that's why I'm so skeptical right now.

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