Overheard in Milne Library

"Dude, I've been sober this whole week just to keep up with my grades."

Skivvy scam

I was checking my email this morning and opened one from Express with the subject line: Free panty--three days only! Am I one to turn down something free? Absolutely not. So I go to the website, punch in the promotion code and go to the online checkout to get my $7.50 unmentionables fo' free. But wait! Shipping and handling costs $8. Psh. Rule of thumb: if it sounds too good to be true, then it is.

When you're here, you're God's family

Disaster has struck! For the past few months, there has been ongoing construction at a site in Geneseo that I heard was going to become an Olive Garden--exciting news for our little Podunk town. Lately the building has started to take shape; the roof arched the same way as every other chain restaurant and it looked like an Olive Garden until a steeple appeared on the roof. IT'S GOING TO BE A CHURCH. I know the whole transubstantiation deal means endless body and blood of Christ, but I was really looking forward to the endless salad and breadsticks.

Katy and I decided that we're going to keep knocking the steeple off the roof until they relent and give us our Olive Garden. Anyone looking to join the cause?

Monday, enough said

I feel like if I simply vomited on a few sheets of paper it would be roughly comparable to the creative nonfiction draft I'm trying to finish up. I hate when I hate what I'm writing. Ughhhh.

In unrelated news, my cousin and sister are coming to visit tomorrow. Yay! This means that my draft will necessarily be finished and my room will necessarily be clean by tomorrow morning, and there is some comfort in that . . . if I don't think about the time from now until that point. Blind productivity, that's how I roll.

Travel blog: step one

My deposit for Ireland has been handed over. Eeeeeek!!